Safety Planning for Loved Ones

Safety Planning for Loved Ones

If someone that you care about is in an unhealthy relationship, we want to help you learn more about how to identify the signs of abuse and what to do to encourage that person to seek help.

Domestic Violence is a pattern of coercive, controlling behavior in a romantic relationship that is used to gain or maintain control over a partner.

Domestic Violence is not just physical abuse but also financial, emotional, spiritual, sexual, verbal, and stalking.

Warning signs of abuse:

Seem afraid or anxious to please their partner.
Go along with everything their partner says and does.
Check in often with their partner to report where they are and what they’re doing.
Receive frequent, harassing phone calls from their partner.
Talk about their partner’s temper, jealousy, or possessiveness.

Have frequent injuries, with the excuse of “accidents.”
Frequently miss work, school, or social occasions, without explanation.
Have very low self-esteem, even if they used to be confident.
Show major personality changes (e.g. an outgoing person becomes withdrawn).
Be depressed, anxious, or suicidal.
Be restricted from seeing family and friends.

Do’s

Ask if something is wrong
Express concern
Listen and Validate
Offer help
Support his or her decisions
Offer resources for when leaving is possible

Don’ts

Wait for him or her to come to you
Judge or Blame
Pressure him or her
Give advice
Place conditions on your support
Ask “why” him or her won’t just leave

Abusers are very good at controlling and manipulating their victims. People who are in a domestic violence situation are most of the time depressed, drained, scared, ashamed, and confused. They need encouragement to build up the courage to leave, yet they’ve often been isolated from their family and friends. By spotting the warning signs and offering support, you can help them escape an abusive situation and begin healing.